Jesus Was White!

So like, there's like all these pictures of Jesus, and he's like, white in all of them. I mean, his skin is white, and he has blue eyes, and blond hair. So that like proves Jesus exists, because it's a miracle that Jesus could like, live in Egypt or Iraq or whatever, and not have a tan! ROFLMAO!!!!1one1

And the bible even says Jesus is real. I mean, that book was written like, a super long time ago, and like, that proves that he was real, because those people lived with Jesus! They wouldn't lie about something like that, would they?

And it also says in the bible that Pi is equal to 3. I don't know what Pi is, but if it's anything like pie, I'm sure it's scrum-diddly-umptious! I had some apple pie last night, and it was simply sublime. It was so delicious! If Jesus wasn't real, then why is apple pie so scrumptious? Hmm? Answer me that, you scientific atheists!

And the world is like, only 6000 years old. In the bible, if you add up all the important people's ages up, it comes up to about 6000 years! But what about the Dinosaurs? That's what atheists ask me all the time! And I'm all like, "I don't believe in dinosaurs! I never seen one in my life!" Take that, atheists! Two can play at that game!

You know, like air is invisible, right? Well, so is God! He's magic! And just because you can't see it, doesn't mean it isn't real! And Evolution is only a THEORY! Duh! That means it's not fact. They made it all up. My grandpa wasn't a fucking monkey! That's just silly! My grandpa was a human, just like me. If evolution was real, then my grandpa would be a monkey, now wouldn't he? Shows just how much you know, you stupid atheists!

But anyway, Jesus was white, is the point I'm trying to get across. He wasn't black, or even tan. Look at the pictures! The bible-people are the ones who took his picture! It proves it! Jesus had blond hair and blue eyes! Beautiful blue eyes. Long, blond hair. Legs that go on for miles. Soft skin...