Jesus fucking Christ, I hate Christians! They’re self-righteous, pompous assholes who believe that the entire world revolves around them. Fucking assholes. But the trait I hate most in Christians is their utter inability to use birth control.

The Duggar Family is a good ol’ family from Arkansas, who, according to the front page of their website, happen to have 18 fucking kids! Yes, they have 18 kids. The thing is, they used to use birth control, but the wife apparently got pregnant, had a miscarriage, and was incredibly upset over it. I have one question: why? If I was a female, I’d be hoping for miscarriages every time I got pregnant (which wouldn’t be frequently, because I’m smart enough to use birth control). I think miscarriages are a blessing. More people should have them. Child birth isn’t a miracle. It happens hundreds of thousands of times per day. The ability to use birth control is a miracle. We have too many people on Earth! Stop fucking!

Of course, being the asshole Christians that they are, they can’t just let their kids grow up and make their own decisions about their religious affiliations, they have to indoctrinate them when they’re young and gullible. It’s incredibly sick. Everyone knows that if you wait until children are older to indoctrinate them, they will take it no more seriously than Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny. Here’s a challenge for you Christians: if you have so much faith in your god, why don’t you wait until your children are capable of thinking for themselves before you start indoctrinating them. See how many of them fall for your bullshit then. I’m guessing very few, if any, will convert to the Dark Side.

And due to the Duggar Family’s utter inability to use birth control, or even to abstain from sexual contact for more than five minutes at a time, they have contributed to the world’s destruction. That’s 18 people who will grow up, have 18 more kids of their own, all of them dipshits (as all Christians are). That’s 324 people who will hold up traffic, preach at you and tell you you’re going to hell, drive gas-guzzling SUVs, ruin the environment, and refuse to tip waitresses on Sundays because they think people shouldn’t work on Sundays. Of course, the Christians don’t care about the environment, because the Rapture is coming soon, and the environment won’t be their problem at that point. We have to stop them! Contact your Congressman! Tell them we need laws against Christians reproducing so often and frequently! Tell them we need laws in place governing their reproductive behavior!

I know what you’re thinking: “It’s none of your business what they do in the bedroom! If they want to have 18 kids, let them have 18 kids! It’s not hurting anyone LOLOLOLOLOLZ!” But the thing is, it IS my business, and it IS hurting everyone. As I said in the above paragraph, they’re destructive assholes who don’t give a shit about the environment, because they believe the Rapture is coming soon, which is a very scary thought. Their complete disregard for people who aren’t like THEM is absolutely frightening.

Also, the Christians like to view themselves as America’s Parents, and if they see fit to try to govern what other people do in their bedroom (I am referring, of course, to the Christians’ stance on homosexuality), I think I can do the same. It goes both ways, assholes.

I hope the Rapture does come soon. I can’t wait for the wacko, nutty Fundamentalist Christians to get the fuck off planet Earth.